Guide To First Time Painless Sex For Virgin Couple (Part 2) - Funmi Akingbade

The choice of the room should provide for enough privacy and create a romantic atmosphere. Dim lights are more romantic. All these have a calming effect on the couple and help to remove any anxiety and feeling of embarrassment. Dark light is not sexually appealing at all.

They can then graduate into holding of hands and maintaining good body contact. The body contact should take a longer time to enable the lady especially to be more relaxed and prepared for the job ahead. Then lovingly, undress each other. It is needful for the newly wedded to undress in front of each other since it helps to quickly handle shyness. Continue...

As the undressing goes on, hugging and kissing should also come in gently and at intervals. After removing one piece of dress, kissing and hugging should follow before removing the next piece. It is important not to give room for embarrassment at all because you are now husband and wife.

Make sure this lingers on until you both feel a sense of complete relaxation [this is also called love play].  You do not need to be in a hurry at all; hurrying through this stage is one of the things that kill sexual confidence and trust. And the moment this is lost at this particular stage, it will greatly affect the sex bed henceforth. Remember the wedding night is just the beginning of a lifetime of sexual enjoyment together.

This could generate to full caressing of each other’s upper body like the breasts, most especially the nipple. It should not be roughly fondled. Let the man use his tongue gently on the breast; it is very stimulating and exciting. The lady should let her husband know whenever he does something that excites her. This will encourage the bride to be more relaxed and have a loving attitude towards sex and her husband. The bride should also try to caress whichever part the husband desires to be touched and kissed.

Love-play should continue for about 30 minutes or more. To start with, a new bride needs a longer time than an older wife who had been married for many years. However, women generally take longer time to get into the mood of lovemaking regardless of their age. Through constant practice, some couples know when the wife is ready for the man to ‘enter.’ It is, therefore, advisable that the man continues to caress the wife’s clitoris and the lips of the vagina to feel any wetness. When this is felt, it means the woman is ready for the show. It is important for the groom to make sure the bride is wet and ready before he penetrates her and both can always use an additional lubricant if it still feels painful down there.

Remember to always insert the penis in the gentlest way possible and never follow insertion immediately with vigorous thrusting as this usually decreases arousal in ladies. Better still, let her do the inserting herself to prevent entering in the wrong place or through the wrong angle.  Sometimes even after insertion, the lady might still need a light caressing of the clitoris to aid her orgasm. Besides, it also prevents the new bride from undergoing undue pains, which may portray a negative picture of sex from the outset.

There is a possibility of the lady not reaching orgasm on the first night or at the initial stage of marriage. Couples should not stress themselves, they have more time to live together and as time goes on, they will learn how to build each other’s excitement and satisfy each other more. The husband must bear in mind that at the time of first sexual intimacy, he should not strive to bring his wife to orgasm with the penis in the vagina. She will definitely have some soreness, (if her hymen is still intact) and there is no reason to make this worse. After the penis is inserted, therefore, the husband should reach his orgasm quickly, withdraw and then stimulate his wife gently with his finger to bring her to orgasm. I would love to say here to the bride that the size of the man’s penis plays a big part in how pleasurable or painful sex can feel. If the groom penetrates into his bride and it feels too painful, then he should start by having sex using just the tip of his penis. Over time, the groom can penetrate a little deeper and then sex for her would start to feel more comfortable. The chances of the bride experiencing an orgasm the very first time may be low, so don’t keep your expectations high.